Sunday, July 09, 2006

Phil Steele: Need We Say More? Yes, In Fact, we do...

We all know how great Phil Steele is. I don't need to sit here and say that his magazine has been the most accurate in terms of predictions for the past seven years running or how for only 9 bucks he provides 328 of both useful and useless (but always welcome) college football information. But considering I just told you anyway, you can probably guess the direction this post is going in.

While nursing a serious case of bored-out-of-my-ass this morning, I decided to flip through my 'Steele and just randomly start reading. Somewhere after actually taking a dangerously high interest in the positioning of the 3rd, 4th, and 5th best teams in the Sun Belt, I ran across an ad for Now, as someone who has more or less skimmed over every one of those 328 pages, I can tell you I had in fact visited the famed Guru's site in the past. Obviously those 7 years slaving in the underground of Athens, GA, or wherever Phil actually writes this stuff, didn't serve to help his web development skills, as I can say without a doubt that the web site kinda sucked. Aside from ordering his magazine, a visitor really couldn't do anything. There was no content, there were no statistics, hell there wasn't even a picture of the guy. This last pint was very disconcerting.

Anyway, whatever my motives were, I decided to check back with the old ' today, and was overjoyed to find an actual Question and Answer section with the man behind the mask. Finally, a chance to interact with a real expert! No more arrogant columnists who don't even address your question, instead choosing to merely pass the issue by for some lame answer I could get from any bum on a message board (or worse yet a blogger). Not only that, I seemed to have found the only full body (actually its kinds like 3/5ths of a body) photograph of the amazing analyst himself…

Yes Friends, this Greek god of College Football sports a receding hairline, mustache, and the thumbs up signal. Good Call Phil. I'm sure T. Kyle King would be proud.

Phil seems to be the kind of guy you really can't debate with, kind of like those arrogant lawyers from the ACLU who hold you up in all that legal mumbo-jumbo. Case and point the Q&A section. When a reader asked about why in the hell he has Oklahoma at #1 (which a lot of bloggers have been asking), he proceeds to smother said reader and any other lowly website visitors with a plethora or facts and passed circumstances that, if unable to convert you to his viewpoint, serve to temporarily paralyze you from even thinking of some kind of rebuttal. The same goes for the question about Kent State. After checking it in Microsoft Word, Phil writes a 1226 word answer to the simple quesiton of how he could pick a 1-10 Kent State team to win the MAC East. Now, who in the hell else can even write 1,226 words on Kent State? I sure as hell can't, and I'm someone who actually cares somewhat about the MAC (although come to think of it, who among us can really write 1,226 words about the MAC?) After such an answer, I don't even want to think, and am perfectly content on saying something along the lines of "Whatever you say, like I care who wins the MAC East and plays in the GMAC Bowl."

Another fan dared to make a statement on how he wouldn't buy a 'Steele because it was a "gambling magazine." Not only is the fan in question an idiot for not buying a 'Steele, he pretty much provokes a Sodom and Gomorrah response in which, let's face it, survival is impossible. For God's sake, Phil even breaks out a graph on this one to show the fan how he can't possible be correct in calling his beloved creation a simple "gambling magazine." The nerve of some folks.

But damn, I tell you, that man certainly knows what he is talking about. I’ve decided to draft up a quesiton for his website, although considering his responses, it may take e a few days to draft just the right one. Another interesting thing of note is that Phil has a number you can call to schedule him for a radio show. I'd love to see this guy on an EDSBS podcast. Someone should convince Orson to pull up some of his connections.


Anonymous said...

Mr. A - Phil Steele's frequently on the local afternoon guy in Norfolk-VaBch. Great answers, FULL of data...but he's not debating or discussing. He is proclaiming.

Vince said...

his real website,

also serves as an abomination to all things HTML. Great content, horrible websites...why doesn't he just use wordpress or blogspot if he isn't selling anything? I'd love to switch spots with him, but I am just sayin